


'Romeo Oh Romeo'

by Doylebaby



Category: Troy (2004)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-26
Updated: 2014-05-26
Packaged: 2018-01-26 16:22:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1694735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doylebaby/pseuds/Doylebaby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for au_bingo.</p><p>Our Troy boys have moved from Troy to Shakespearean England, where they are actors. </p><p>In Shakespeare’s time it was forbidden for women to perform on stage, therefore we’ll find Paris playing the part of the lovely Juliet… that is, during the brief moments they actually perform Romeo and Juliet. </p><p>Something is distracting Odysseus from performing properly.</p><p> <br/>Probably slightly crack fic-ish...</p>
            </blockquote>





	'Romeo Oh Romeo'

**Author's Note:**

> Written for au_bingo for the prompt others: actors.
> 
> Other: actors, means that your usual characters have to be actors for this prompt. So you'll find the Troy boys have turned into actors. 
> 
> All text in _italics_ is Shakespeare’s and not mine.

[ ](http://s21.photobucket.com/albums/b261/Doylebaby/?action=view&current=21ecde5f.jpg)

****

“Romeo Oh Romeo”

“ _Romeo, oh Romeo, where for_ **the bloody hell** _art thou, Romeo?_ ” Paris shouted in annoyance to an empty stage from the set balcony.

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Odysseus yelled back, slapping Achilles’ hand away from trying to fondle his private parts. “These tights are far too revealing,” he complained to no one in particular.

“I like them.” Achilles grinned impertinently.  
Achilles’ acting abilities weren’t in the least bit memorable, therefore he was trying to gain immortality, or at least some sort of fame, in other ways… Not that he was succeeding.

Odysseus finally stumbled onto the stage, tripping over his sword as he tried to tug down his ridiculously short jacket that did nothing to hide his lower body in general and certain parts in particular, from the rest of the world.

He could hear Hector sniggering in the wings and Odysseus sent murderous looks at Paris’ brother who was playing Juliet’s cousin, Tybalt.

Trying to concentrate on his lines, Odysseus recited, “ _Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?_ … Can’t I have a cloak or something? I feel very… exposed.”

“Odysseus!” Paris cried out above him. “Would you please focus on your lines instead of your balls?”

They could hear Achilles and Hector howling with laughter in the wings.

Odysseus looked up at his beloved Paris/Juliet. “I’ll try. Do continue,” he urged.

Paris cleared his throat. “I’ll skip a bit okay, or we’ll never get home today.”

Odysseus nodded and waved with his hand for Paris to continue.

“ _…though not a Montague. What's Montague? It is nor hand, nor foot, Nor arm, nor face, nor…_ BALLS!!!” he shouted when Odysseus started to fidget again. Paris' wig slid down over his eyes when he moved his head too fast in his fury.

Achilles and Hector were standing backstage, holding each other up, laughing so hard they drowned out the sounds on stage. “She’s got quite a mouth on her, doesn’t she?” Achilles asked Hector.

Hector nodded. “I thought she was supposed to be a virgin?”

“Shut up, you two!” Paris called at them with a roll of his eyes before turning back to Odysseus again. “We’ll get you a longer jacket, alright Dissy? Now let’s just try to finish this scene.”

Paris shoved his wig back into place again and inhaled deeply through his nose, breathing out through his mouth until he could focus on his lines once more. 

“ _This bud of love, by summer's ripening breath, May prove a beauteous flower when next we meet. Good night._ ” Paris declared passionately as Juliet.

Odysseus tried to pay attention and replied. “ _O, wilt thou leave me so unsatisfied?_ ”

“I bet he… uhm _she_ will definitely not leave you unsatisfied, Romeo,” Hector sniggered to Achilles.

The two on stage pretended not to hear.

“ _What satisfaction canst thou have to-night?”_ Paris/Juliet wanted to know.

“Oh I can think of a thing or two,” Achilles giggled and Odysseus couldn’t help himself, he started to grin as well.

“Okay, that’s it!” Paris shouted, ripping his wig off his head in disgust. “I’ve had enough of the lot of you, I’m going home!” He stalked off the balcony, clutching his skirts together in his hand so he wouldn’t trip, and clambered down the steps. When he passed his brother and friend on the way to the dressing rooms he slapped them both up side the head. “Bastards,” he grumbled. 

When Paris threw the door of the dressing room open, his lover was already there, having taken the offending tights off, showing Odysseus in a state of arousal that made Paris lick his lips.

“I think you owe me,” he told Odysseus, closing the door and quickly stripping off his costume. He dropped his undergarments on the floor and without further ado straddled his Romeo taking the pulsing shaft into his body. Their coupling earlier in the day made it an easier feat. A little viciously, Paris set a fast pace, challenging Odysseus to keep up.

It didn’t take long for Odysseus to come and then he took hold of Paris’s throbbing shaft, drawing his lover's orgasm from him.

“Am I forgiven?” Odysseus murmured against Paris’ lips.

“Mmm,” Paris purred lazily. “At least your balls didn’t suffer.”

The End


End file.
